23.04.24: Full Moon in Scorpio
“I hope you will go out and let stories, that is life, happen to you, and that you will work with these stories from your life – not someone else's life – water them with your blood and tears and your laughter till they bloom, till you yourself burst into bloom. That is the work. The only work.”
― Clarissa Pinkola Estés, Women Who Run With the Wolves
Hello, dear One,
some weeks ago, I was sleeping and had the air conditioning running when something heavy fell on my chest. Instinctively, I wiped it off and turned on the lights There he was, a Scorpio made its way through the A/C onto my chest.
Luckily, after 3 years of living in the jungle, I know how to deal with those guys.
And guess what, exactly on this day I sent a message to a dear friend, talking about my relationship with the Scorpio archetype and how much I'm currently in a transition with it. Coincidence? Synchronicity? Faith? I will probably never know.
Years ago, I felt very intimidated by a Scorpio Full Moon that brought up tons of pain which made me fear this archetype for quite a while.
And I'm so happy to say, that today, I am able to connect to the energy of this archetype so enthusiastically and share my vulnerable findings with you.
Please get your popcorn ready, there is certainly going to be some soul striptease here but since I'm trusting that my experiences are somehow reflected on a collective level, I truly hope they'll serve you too.
FULL MOON IN SCORPIO: WHEN DEPTH & DEATH IS CALLING
This phase of the Moon occurs at 4 degrees and 18 minutes of Scorpio, so if you are born with personal planets (Sun, Moon, Mercury, Venus, Mars) and sensitive points (North Node, South Node, etc.) at approximately 0 to 8 degrees of the Fixed signs (Taurus, Leo, Scorpio, and Aquarius) you'll probably feel its charge most strongly.
As you probably know, Full Moons happen when the Sun and Moon are in opposition in the heavens. So today, we have the Sun in Taurus and the Moon in Scorpio, illuminated by the sun's light.
If we look at the zodiac as a representation of human consciousness, then Scorpio is probably the deepest point being touched there.
Coming after Libra (meeting “the Other”), Scorpio is willing to dive deep, into the ground of the sea, making himself completely naked (meaning: vulnerable).
Now, that we've related in Libra, Scorpio wants to go to the depths of the psyche. Rather than small talk, he asks the eternal WHY-question, having one eyebrow suspiciously raised.
SCORPIO AND HIS DANGEROUS SUSPICION
In superficial Astrology, Scorpio is often described as “manipulative”, “dangerous” and "suspicious".
Not one of the archetypes with a good reputation. Unfortunately, that's also a mirror of a society that is having a rather hard time dealing with Scorpio topics.
I'd rather like to ask, why is it that Scorpio is described in such a way?
As often, understanding the archetype in its depths will open gates to understanding ourselves and the world better.
Scorpio, a fixed, yang, water sign that is ruled by Pluto (and Mars before Pluto was discovered), is considered to be one of the healer archetypes of the zodiac.
His healing ability comes from understanding the depths of the human psyche. Because he's eternally interested in “WHY?”, he's able to get to the bottom of things.
Through lots of transformational experiences in life, Scorpio cannot only understand himself deeply but also others, to connect deeply to life – in the best case. And of course, since we look at all archetypes within a spectrum, we also know that this can be used in an unconscious way being manipulative, unnecessarily dramatic, or being swallowed by the darkness.
AN EXCURSION ON DEATH & LIFE AND HOW IT'S INTERCONNECTED
I remember when I entered my first therapy around 10 years ago. My mother was diagnosed with an aggressive form of Cancer that didn't seem hopeful.
Talking a lot about death with my therapist, I discovered that I had severe anxiety about both her dying but also my own death which was often masked through hypochondria – being anxious about having all sorts of different symptoms and illnesses.
I remember having dreams about dying and I won't forget how my therapist, an old wise Iranian man who had such a lovely father energy that I truly needed at that time, said to me: “A fear of dying; Karina, is often just a fear of living.”
Of course, 10 years ago, being 25, I wasn't really getting what he was talking about.
But today, oh yes, continuing my own studies around the human psyche and feeling deeply connected to the archetypes, I think I started to get a glimpse of what he meant and I am happy I can share this with you curious people.
THE MORE UNLIVED YOUR LIFE, THE GREATER DEATH ANXIETY
For the past years, I've been studying existential psychotherapy through the work of Irvin D. Yalom who writes in one of his books “Starring at the Sun”:
“...the more unlived your life, the greater your death anxiety. The more you fail to experience your life fully, the more you will fear death.”
I'm wondering, on this Full Moon in Scorpio: Is it maybe the connection to death and the surrendering to the fact that our time on earth is limited that can uphold the promise of a fully lived life?
Honestly, I don't know. I'm a student myself here but what I certainly know is that after my mother had died and grief had fully penetrated my whole being – and almost broken my heart – I've felt more alive than ever.
Since then, I have started to let parts of myself die more often and let go of control, I'm experiencing a deeper connection to life.
AN ORGASMIC LIFE STARTS IN OUR BODIES AND HEARTS
Spending my last three years of life in the jungle, in lots of solitude and without many romantic encounters, I had to learn to fall in love with life, to be in romance with myself, and feel pleasure in other things than “another human” – shortly: to let life flow through me – especially when it got dark.
I started to understand that the foundation for an orgasmic and ecstatic life doesn't necessarily start when getting in touch with someone but getting in touch with my own heart and body.
Isn't it interesting that Taurus being the polarity of Scorpio teaches us exactly that? The more we feel our bodies and values, the deeper we can indulge in life and another being (Scorpio).
I heard many years ago: “As deep as you breathe, as deep your life gets.”
…and I started to take deeper breaths, to check in more often with my body and it seemed to be true: It helped me to connect to a deeper life.
I would love to write the amount of a book about all that but I am trying to keep it concise here: Can you see how life, death, and sexuality are interwoven and so deeply and philosophically expressed through the archetype of Scorpio?
PLUTO IN THE GAME WITH THIS FULL MOON
As if it wouldn't be enough that the Scorpio Full Moon confronts us with all its intensity, Pluto – the ruler of Scorpio – is in a square with both Moon and Sun which is called a T-Square in Astrology.
What does this stand for? The shit is hitting the fence. People might be losing what they've been trying to hold up for a while. Concepts and versions of yourself might crumble at the altar of a new life that is waiting for you.
This is no time to mince words, it's time to surrender to this incredible power and keep believing that whatever is being taken away will bring you closer to a more aligned version of yourself and connect you deeper to a life path that is truly meant for you.
At least that's what I keep learning from Pluto (awaiting my Pluto-Moon-Transit in some year's time).
QUESTIONS THE MOON WOULD ASK TODAY
If the Full Moon in Scorpio could speak to us from the heavens, it would ask the following questions:
How do you embrace endings? Do you see the seed of new beginnings in endings?
Do you dare to feel deeply? Do you allow the intensity of life to grab you without notice and swirl you around?
Are you afraid of dying? Do you connect to the feeling that life is limited? Do you talk about death? How do you process grief?
What about sexuality? Do you allow yourself to question the idea of sexuality that has been put into your mind by society and your upbringing?
COULD SEX AND DEATH GO TOGETHER?
In “Creatures of a Day”, Yalom writes: “Sex as the vital antagonist to death – the orgasm the primal spark of life? I know of many instances in which sexual feelings arise in order to neutralize fears of death."
Furthermore, he describes working with many Cancer patients and their widows who often experience a strong sex drive while grieving for their gone partners.
In his book “Cosmos and Psyche” Stanislav Grof says that there are four encounters when we're closest to god: When we're born, when we give birth, when we have sex, and when we die.
Do you see the integration of the Scorpio archetype here as much as I do?
A NEW DEFINITION FOR SEXUALITY NEEDED
What if instead of seeing sexuality only as genital penetration, we give it a new definition: The ability to let life penetrate us – in all our tender (and unconscious) places?
To allow each moment to touch us with its intensity and to feel it rather than avoiding it at all costs – with our bodies and souls.
I recently read the (German) book “No More Second-Hand Sex: Inner Instead of Outer Experience - Sexuality That Touches Your Entire Life".
In the book, Marlise Santiago talks about a rather new definition of sexuality done by Paul Sporkens that contains three circles:
The outer circle stands for the outer experience of sexuality: The way we behave generally with other humans, how we glance at other people, the conversations we have, how we walk in nature, and so on.
The middle circle represents the middle area of sexuality: The sensual, tender, and erotic – such as caressing, kissing, massaging, and hugging another human. It also represents the felt experience.
The inner circle represents the area of the genitals: Having penetrative sex such as petting, masturbating, and genital sex.
A SEXUAL REVOLUTION FOR THE SAKE OF A DEEPER LIFE
Having brought up this definition, I'm wondering how it was possible that we might have been sold a definition of sexuality and orgasm that only includes genitals and leaves out our soul?
In her book, Santiago writes: “I dare to express an idea: The satisfaction of the genitals stands at the end of the spectrum of human needs, genital orgasms often compensate for completely different (and deeper) human longings.”
I know, this might blow the mind for many of us, myself included, but I am truly convinced that we can return to a state of natural ecstasy, pleasure, and bliss when we allow life to move through us.
When we open our hearts to the present moment and when we reduce the distractions that the world throws at us to not feel.
“When we allow ourselves to live deeply”, Scorpio would say.
When we dare to be with what arises naturally, rather than what our mind wants to build out of the need for control. When we talk about our death anxiety and why we might be afraid to die.
When we dare to express our deepest needs for intimacy and connection our hearts are truly craving.
Maybe then, Scorpio will greet us at the threshold of his deep waters with a huge smile on his face, saying: “Hello my friend, I've been waiting for you for. Ready for another dip?".
With lots of love,
Karina
** header graphic from GIPHY.com
